Charlize Theron, Jessica Alba and Halle Berry are regularly named the world’s sexiest women. But who are the unsexiest women alive? A men’s magazine decided to find out.

The list, published in the latest edition of Maxim Magazine, named Sex and the City star Sarah Jessica Parker as the No. 1 Unsexiest Woman Alive.

The magazine said Parker was the “least sexy woman in a group of very unsexy women” that ironically starred in a show with the word “sex” in the title.

Troubled soul singer Amy Winehouse was voted No. 2 because of her “hemorrhaging translucent skin, rat’s nest mane and lashes that look more like surgically attached bats”.

The mag listed Grey’s Anatomy Sandra Oh at No. 3 for her “cold bedside manner and boyish figure”.

Pop star Madonna took out the No. 4 spot for her “self-righteous bellyaching and rapid postnuptial deterioration”.

“Combine a Paris Hilton-like pet accessorising fetish only for dirt-poor foreign babies with a mug that looks Euro-sealed to her skull, and you’ve got Willem Dafoe with hot flashes,” Maxim Magazine said.

Britney Spears came in at No. 5 for “losing the ability to perform”.

The mag also said two children, two ex-husbands and a slight weight gain also helped Britney nab the No. 5 spot.

Maxim Magazine’s list of the world’s unsexiest women:

1. Sarah Jessica Parker
2. Amy Winehouse
3. Sandra Oh
4. Madonna
5. Britney Spears